More Thoughts

And here are some other thoughts…

I love the fact that the video addressed the rights of fathers.  Sure, it is the woman who is pregnant, but a child belongs to both who create it, not just the woman.  A father ought to have equal say in the rights of the child.  It seems beyond wrong to me that a woman can choose to end the life of a child and the father legally can’t do anything about it.

The behaviour of ‘Laura’ also strike me as bizarre.  Let me start by saying I think she has great intentions and is passionate about caring for women in crisis.  But she talks about people who protest at ‘pro-life’ things as being offensive and abusive (which I have no doubt is true a lot of the time).  However it is her who is the abusive one in this piece.  She’s the one yelling abuse.  It seems strange that she is doing the exact thing she is saying is horrible and disgusting.  I understand that she is passionate and is letting her emotions take over, but it seems like an absurd response given her accusations.

I think the guy in this video shows a lot of passion and compassion.  I am largely impressed with all that he says and does.  And even if you disagree, you can’t fault his intentions.  I don’t fault Laura’s intentions either, but I do fault her actions.

One of the other issues being raised is that of the trauma associated with giving a child up for adoption, or bringing a child into the world in ‘bad’ (in inverted commas because it has many meanings) circumstances.  I agree that having a child under ‘bad’ circumstances would be difficult, and in some cases traumatic, but isn’t ending the life of a child of your own creation simply a different form of trauma?  It seems to be adding to the trauma rather than removing it.  I don’t think this solves the situation, but rather makes it worse.  Surely it is creating another set of problems.  Perhaps some would say these are ‘better’ (or ‘less worse’) problems, but I would not agree.


3 Replies to “More Thoughts”

  1. In an ideal, perfect world, a father would have the same rights as a mother. In fact, in an ideal, perfect world there would be nobody who felt they needed to have an abortion. But in the real world, do you really want a rapist or abusive partner to have the right to force a women that they have hurt to carry their child? Until the child is born, I think the mother should have the overriding say in if or how the pregnancy proceeds. If shes in a positive relationship with the father, then I imagine that he would be involved.

    Fathers dont loose their jobs and ruin their careers by getting pregnant. Fathers dont die during child birth (unless they really piss off the mother) Fathers font get gestational diabetes, pre eclamspia or any other number of life threatening and altering conditions as a result of pregnancy.

    There is no perfect solution, you can only do the best to minimize the impact of harm. By prohibiting women from having access to abortion or allowing partners to have equal say in decisions to abort (and think about it, why would a women in a happy, healthy, supportive relationship feel the need to have an abortion) you are effectively saying that once a women becomes pregnant, her rights and choices around her body and her life are secondary to someone elses. And its true, this might be how some women view their lives when they become mothers – but they make that choice.

    Yes that choice might mean ending a life and that is a tragedy but the choice is going to have the most impact on the woman and the rest of her life, its her choice to make and her consequences to live with – more than anyone else, including the father

    If men want to have more of a say in abortion, and their partners choice, then they need to be better people before their partner gets pregnant. They need to be supportive and caring and force community standards around treatment of women, domestic and relationship abuse to change.

    I also want to addres your point about self sustaining life that you made earlier – yes a fish needs water or an aquarium, and people need oxygen. But you can generally move the fish to a different body of water or aquarium if need be – and humans dont have to occupy the same square foot of space and rely on the body of another to survive. Until the point where a fetus can viably survive outside its mothers womb, I think she should get to decide if she wants that to happen. If she so chooses the option to abort then as a community we have no right to do anything apart from accept her choice with grace.

    If we want to reduce the number of women having abortions then we need to change alot of things, but limiting womens rights and access is not the answer.
    I think that if the prolife movement invested as much time and energy into those pursuits as they do into their various protests campaigns then maybe the world would be a better place.
    Megan, I admire and respect you, especially your commitment to your faith and beliefs, I promise you, when we have a perfect world, then I will agree with your point of view on abortion

    1. “and think about it, why would a women in a happy, healthy, supportive relationship feel the need to have an abortion”


      Are you saying there are no abortions inside a happy, healthy, supportive relationship?

      “Why women have abortions
      1% of all abortions occur because of rape or incest; 6% of abortions occur because of potential health problems regarding either the mother or child, and 93% of all abortions occur for social reasons (i.e. the child is unwanted or inconvenient).”

      “The reasons women give for having an abortion underscore their understanding of the responsibilities of parenthood and family life. Three-fourths of women cite concern for or responsibility to other individuals; three-fourths say they cannot afford a child; three-fourths say that having a baby would interfere with work, school or the ability to care for dependents; and half say they do not want to be a single parent or are having problems with their husband or partner.”
      (These stats were grabbed quickly, but numbers anything like this are scary)

      The real issue is, why it is happening. Abortion is NOT accepted as an extreme solution for a serious problem. For all the talk about rape and health, ABORTION HAS BEEN ACCEPTED AS A CONVENIENCE by our society. And the scarey part is where it could end up. Take a look at the history of isseus like divorce, prostitution, affairs and pornography in our society. You will see a gradual move from unacceptance towards open acceptance, and the movement still has momentum. At first there are a few pushing the boundaries, then, for the sake of extreme cases or harm minimisation, society’s boundaries are relaxed, then the law follows. But there are still people pushing at the edge. Where will we say stop.
      In the case of abortion, the boundary pushers are killing babies if they are the wrong sex. Im only speculating, but I can see a time when ‘women’s choice’ is taken back off them in favor of a society without birth defects and genetic illnesses: As we move towards slowing and capping population, the boundary pushers will want that cap filled with the healthiest people possible. So forced abortion of the unhealthiest babies could become a reality.
      Abortion for the sake of convenience used to be the extreme, but not any more. If activiest can stop abortions at the clinic door, and, though support, change the minds of parents and eventually society, then they have my blessing.

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